The Reality Of Our Existence

We have been told by those who claim to speak for the God of creation that what we are in this world now is what we desired before we entered into this realm. For some of us, this may be true. The seemingly lucky, the fortunate, the chosen as it were, their lives are joy, their success complete. Yet they must hide behind a curtain of falsehood for they too will be affected by the factor of negativity which affects us all, rich and poor, those who have attained and those who never attained anything. A sum of money, a large house, comfort and a full belly, health and happiness, all the trappings of the god fearing, and those who have failed, miserably or were destined to doom- the destitute, the poor, sick, homeless, the inability to think or calculate or plan their life for their own betterment. Does this seem fair? Not at all, yet all are as in a prison, all of us. For this reason there is death, a portal of escape. We dream of leaving yet are afraid to leave, we hope for a better existence, yet refuse to give up what we have, having become used to life with no possible chance of parole. This prison, the chains of our bodies and all the snags of life- behold reality.

What God of compassion and love would put us here? A merciful creator in control, allowing such suffering for the rich and the poor, the healthy and the diseased, he is 'testing us' they explain..."he is testing you. Do not tempt this Lord!" But I thought he is all knowing? Why must he test us? Does he but play like Zeus did on Olympus, toying with our lives? Zeus has long been forgotten, like the bubonic plague, no longer pertinent and lacking meaning in our time according to our understanding. But not this God who supposedly created our world, can't be. Oh no, he is different isn't he? Some say it is a she, oh well. Let me understand this- the supreme being, loving and kind, merciful and compassionate, all knowing and worker of miracles allows us to suffer because He/She loves us, because He/She cares, because if we are good we attain to heavenly glory. All we have to do is use the free will He/She granted us and choose a religion to follow, because in that religion we can find the good, the secret to spiritual immortality. Yet, we have been lied to. How many have suffered at the hands of the codified and organized dogmas of those very faiths, causing whole cultures and civilizations which developed over centuries to disappear seemingly overnight. All faiths share a universal view, yes, a common notion. The central deity is all knowing, all good and in charge. Pray and seek this deity, and there is nothing to worry about. Yet within these institutions is embedded the very seeds of evil that has time and again wrought destruction and bloodshed all in the name of a supposedly non egotistical God. Be warned, though- in the faiths of Abraham this deity forgives us for any slight intended or mistaken act but claims He is a jealous God, "take ye not other gods before me!"I thought this deity was perfect and infallible, as I was told he is. Not like humans nor does he share our faults, which he created and put into us for some bizarre reason. Maybe not? I smell a rat, as it were. How nice, and convenient too?

What of the poor wretch who cannot think for himself, the homeless in the streets, wandering along with their companion the stray dog, to and fro here to there, aimlessly? Or the baby born with an inherent disease, doomed as it were to a life of pain, or a shortened stay here on Earth? Those who love this being must suffer his/her loss for him/her. They are despised and shunned and even when charity is shown to them, when pity is taken upon them they suffer the reality of their existence. Death overtakes such a person and they are forgotten, one of millions upon millions who never signed up for this inn, this overnight stop on the caravan of eternity. Their benefactors perish as well, those who judged them right or wrong, they too disappear forever. The suffering animals, birds with broken wings or the fox born with no legs at all, those insects burned alive in forest fires caused by the Almighty's javelin throw of lightening. Beethoven gone deaf, or Van Gogh gone crazy, the innocent child, beaten and abused by cruel parents, or the young girl whose mother sends her to the store to buy milk or bread and while on her way the local store is raped by some perverted derelict who himself is possessed of a perverted disease of the mind and body. When he is finished with his deed he bashes her head against a rock, so she won't tell the world. Of her encounter with the personification of evil her family mourns her loss for decades. The loving mother, now guilt ridden for the rest of her life never forgives herself for sending her for milk in the first place. This is their destiny, for the rest of their stay in this hotel of doom and gloom. Ah, but of course, she must have done something to deserve this! God has a purpose, as it all plays out though we cannot understand. Yeah, right

Have ye seen the tiger or the cougar when it hunts it's prey? The beast acts with rapidity, pouncing on it's intended dinner,  a deer, a gazelle, a water buffalo, a wild pig, sinking it's teeth into the neck of the poor unsuspecting animal and suffocating it with the power of it's jaws, then drags the lifeless body away to be consumed, sharp incisors rip into bloodied flesh, smacking lips with delight. Or as when the owl or the hawk circles overhead, then swoops down from the sky like a winged demon and snaps up a rabbit, the little field mouse or rodent and carries the struggling animal away to it's nest while still alive and screaming from fear  as the little furry thing is ripped apart, piece by piece and fed to the hungry chicks waiting patiently in the nest, or as when the snake is dismembered by the brood devouring it’s sections which still move and wriggle while being ingested by the feathered victors. We are told that this is but the circle of life, natural and normal, they say. After all, this is how God provides sustenance for his creatures. 

We live in the realm of Ahriman, the evil one, Lord of Darkness who fights a cosmic battle for all eternity with the Lord of Goodness and light. The love we feel, the pity we show towards the suffering creatures, the charity we give of our hearts and our souls freely, gladly, without expectation of reward, this is from the realm of the Holy One, the Lord of Illumination. All goodness emanates from this Lord, all things beneficial, so full of goodness and love, light and glory, compassion and mercy, eternal. How can such a deity create that which is fallible? Why would this beautiful being create something programmed only to suffer, or bring about something prone to disease and subsequent demise? Why would such a deity create thus? There are those who see the light and understand it's beauty, beneficial and merciful, caring and loving, only joy is in their hearts, only longing for their Lord, spreading this Lord's love all through the universe while loving all mankind and all creatures. Yet so many of them are tortured, despised, crucified and maimed. Cain slew Abel, did he not? Saul so loved his Lord and loved David yet grew envious of this young one, the 'chosen' singer of Psalms, Saul’s fate would be that he would fall upon his own sword taking his own life. Who is this God who would decree such a fate for one so loyal and devoted as Saul? Jesus, Mani, Ali, Gandhi and Martin Luther King, a literal multitude of saints and the sanctified, thinkers and doers for the avenue of good,. Millions upon millions of caring, seemingly innocent human beings lived in their times, their lives were destroyed over the centuries in wars and invasions. Ah but yes, of course, they had free will! Humans have free will to make up their own minds whether to treat their fellow beings with mercy or harshness just as those buried in the rubble of an earthquake or suffocated in an avalanche had free will, the poor wretch who had to decide whether to remain in a burning building to be roasted alive or jump four score flights to smatter on the sidewalk below as was witnessed in the terrible 9/11 attack on the World trade Center, his or her bodily legacy a pool of blood that once was a human being. If perchance one might survive the ordeal we say “yes, tis a miracle! God works in mysterious ways” And of those who do not survive, we say it is his will, ordained at birth, and only this deity knows for sure. “Accept the will of the Lord” we are told for he knows that which ye do not, and with this acceptance we are silenced, permanently, so many, indeed all of us. Destroyed and torn asunder whilst in this world, disappointed and dubious yet fearing to question or debate, armed with only the knowledge of hope amid promises of the possibility of the next dimension. “The road to hell is paved with good intentions" they say, while we remain in denial of the reality of our existence. Was it this God of beauty and love who created this world and puts forth for us, every day, a new challenge, so as to test us? Or is there some other explanation? Impossible...

Seek ye the Lord of light and goodness within, and without. Our stay in this prison is temporary, for this realm of the Devil, Satan, Ahriman. Matter and gaseous substance, nauseous, ugliness and imbalance, those thwarted hopes and dreams, suspicion and deceit, pain and suffering, none of this is of our Lord of Light and Illumination who, through love, did interject a piece of His/Her self into every atom of every being, every blade of grass, thus fooling the lord of the darkness who thought his creation of matter superior, rocks and mere lumps of dung and semen, gas and noxious fumes, as it were, These could not be disintegrated by the power and force of light amid crystalline rays, blinding the ranks of demons and jinn. Luminescence, in the form of a beautiful angel, named the Sophia. Illumination, granting human kind a semblance of hope, in this way do we confront the arch demon who thinketh himself superior, out of pride and conceit as we pass our days in this prison we never asked to be part of. We are accepting, as it were, the reality of our existence, praying for redemption, praying for guidance and freedom, seeking illumination, to be empowered by Holy Spirit. Our daily struggle, our existence, our reality, the manifestation of the heavenly, cosmic eternal battle that began eons ago and continues for all time. We await the ships of light to transport us to the celestial realm. Dutiful we remain, patient, in anticipation of a beauty so wonderful and illumined that our limited mind of imagination cannot fathom the grandiosity and sheer delight of all that awaits us. And so too, we wait.